So, it's been a month since my scan, still waiting on results, seems they got lost somewhere.  Though recently cancer has become the least of my worries.  It might almost be a relief.  Never thought I'd say that.  I can't really explain for fear of jeopardizing an already hard case, but suffice it to say I've been dragged into a nightmare criminal investigation.  Not sure what the exact charges will be right now, I'm sure I'll be notified when they've been decided on, if they have enough to attempt a conviction.  (I don't have any faith in the justice system, but this cop has been surprisingly good at keeping me informed- I think he has me on speed dial haha).  But it's a sexual abuse/sexual assault case, so even though it's been a nightmare from the beginning I know it's gonna get a whole lot worse real quick - and I'm dreading it.   

My birthday's today, So not the way I planned to start 23.  Hell I didn't even plan to live to 23.  Ah well, depending on this case and my test results I may not see 24, so I guess I should try to enjoy this next year and all the chaos it's gonna bring. 

Had a counselor sprung on me on Thursday.  Ok, maybe sprung isn't the right word.  But I was definitely not informed.  My pastor told me she had a friend she'd 'love' for me to talk to.  (I should have caught on that the extra emphasis on 'love' meant trouble).  She asked again at the end of the evening and I finally agreed to hear this friend out.  "Great" she says, "She's a counselor whom I absolutely love" - Was not expecting that.  But I only agreed to meet her and hear her out (not sure what she has to say) nothing more.  Thankfully.  I also have a massive distrust of any sort of Psych/mental health personnel.  Don't like 'em- at all.  That said, with my past I probably need some sort of help.  Especially given that since this investigation started I'm sleeping very little and eating even less.  The folks who didn't think I ate nearly enough before are having major issues now (been called anorexic twice this week....seriously people?   Look at me, in no way do I look anorexic...) But we won't go there. 

Anyway, I guess I should end this  before it becomes any more pointless.  Hope this finds everyone well.